Baari barsi khatan gaya si, Khat ke le aayandi Heere
(I went shopping, and bought home a Diamond)
Ke mehfil taan saajdi, je naache dulhan ke Veere
(The party has to rock when the Bride’s friends start dancing)
This Punjabi boli says it all. Doesn’t it? Weddings for a matter of fact are incomplete without Friends. Not just the Bride or the Groom, but the entire family eagerly awaits the presence of friends to set all the wedding ceremonies on Fire.
Usually after college, it is at these weddings when all the long lost friends come together to be a part of the, ‘D’ day. We are a group of 4 girls who have been friends since our Post Graduate Diploma in Fashion Designing from @pearlacademy, Delhi. Just like age calls it for the right time to get married, the clock has struck, it is time for each one of us to start getting married.
In the month of December, Khyati (one of the four) tied a knot with Jiten and the rest of us got to be a part of a Gujarati Wedding Ceremony.
Now this blog is about Ankita’s wedding (second one of the four) who got married to Hemant in the month of January. Ankita and Hemant being Punjabis, we got to experience the complete Punjabi Wedding madness which I had only heard about from here and there.
Punjabis love to express any of their emotion with utter zeal and what better than a Punjabi wedding to experience this enthusiasm. Each one of them is practically possessed under the Deity of Fun and Madness. Each of the Pre and Post wedding ceremonies are so colourful, loud and over the top, with tonnes of opportunities for singing and dancing one’s heart out.
A wedding is not just a day’s affair. Each pre and post wedding rituals make a wedding a lengthy affair of about 3-4 days. Now these rituals are not just about having fun but each one adheres to age old traditions and have been passed down and followed through generations. These age old rituals are now a days celebrated with a lot of conventional twist to them.
We were given a theme for each of the pre-wedding ceremonies. For a person like me who is very experimental with her looks, following these themes was something I was definitely looking at. From lehengas to patiala salwars to skirts and dhotis, what better than a wedding to show off my outfits and styling ideas. Now, let’s look at each ritual and the kind of outfits I chose to wear for each of these rituals.
Mehendi– Mehendi is a very festive night during the course of a Punjabi wedding. It is colourful and cheerful and involves lots of singing, dancing. Mehendi is one of the 16 adornments of the Bride, which is applied on the hands and legs of the Bride a day or two before the Wedding. It is said that the darker the colour of the mehendi, the more love the Bride will receive from her in-laws. Since mehendi is one of the first rituals that is hosted by the Family, it acts as a nice ice-breaker for all the guests to know each other. On this day, the Bride usually wears shades of green and so the theme for the guests was also Green and in Patola Style. The rest of the evening is left for dancing and singing and celebrating the new Bride and Groom.
Not just the Bride but a team of Mehendi walis is called even for the guests to apply mehendi on their hands. It’s a paste that you apply on your hands and is left to dry and then taken off. Now, while this paste is wet, there are chances of it coming in touch with the outfits one is wearing. So, the more comfortable attire one chose to wear on this day, the better it is.
I being a designer love to make outfits for myself and thus wore an ensemble done by me. Keeping the theme and colour in mind, I designed an attire that would not make me look bulky or even short @savboond. I wore a Mehendi green crepe patiala pants. One has to show off the cowls that fall in a pair of patiala pants. Thus for the top, I wore a thigh length off-white organza top with minimal floral embroidery that had a dori tie-up to make my waist look smaller. I teamed this outfit with a black georgette dupatta with all over colourful kantha floral embroidery. To complete the look, I wore an all white beaded Juti from @1469original, Delhi
Sagai/Tilak & Sangeet– A ceremony where the Bride and the Groom come face to face and are betrothed to each other by the families. There is an exchange of gifts from both the ends. A small Puja takes place where the Bride’s sister and other family members apply Vermillion(Tika) on the Groom’s head and vice versa. With the exchange of rings, the couple is now officially engaged to each other.
What do Punjabi weddings remind you of? The entire khandaan(family) coming together, great food, dhol and nights spent dancing!. The Tilak ceremony was followed by Sangeet. It is the biggest entertainment factor of any Punjabi wedding. Relatives from both the sides perform on dance numbers and sings songs. There is usually an open dance floor to commemorate the fun of the Wedding Day. Well, why not amplify the fun with a thumka or two on a few Punjabi tracks! We, the Bride’s friends had a performance dedicated specially to the the couple. We danced on the number @lamberghini.
Since the Sagai/Sangeet ceremony was a day event and an open lawn function, the theme for the ceremony was Pastels.
I kept my look very simple for this day. I designed this outfit myself @savboond. I wore a Silver handwoven Murshidabad Silk Dhoti pants. For the top, I wore a Peach Georgette assymetric angrakha with all over Badla work from Lucknow. I teamed the outfit with a silver watch by @gucci on one hand and a golden bangle on the other hand. I completed the look with a Peach pointed Kitten Heels from @kurseong.
And since we were under the Winter sun, a pair of sunglasses matching the colour of my outfit, became my saviour for the day.
The highlight of this entire look was my Talisman Earrings with hair chain from the Chandrika Collection by @tribebyamrapali.
Cocktail Night- Cocktail Night is an informal meet for the youth of both the sides. It is usually an extension of the Sangeet Night. But, since our Sangeet Ceremony was done during the day, Cocktail was organised only for the Bride’s side for the night. There was live music, appetisers and some alcohol to let yourself lose and get into the Party Vibe.
Since western was the theme, what better than a black lace dress for the Night, right?! I wore a calf length lace dress from my shopping spree in @kurseong. I teamed this outfit with a pair of Beige and Black stilettos from @charles&keith. The evening in Kanpur was quiet cold and so I topped my dress with a silver overcoat from @kurseong and a pair of long tassel earrings I got from @janpath, Delhi.
Haldi, Phoolon Ki Holi, Chuda and Kaleerien Da Rasam– These ceremonies are held in the morning of the Wedding Day. A paste of Turmeric Powder, oil, milk, sandalwood powder and rose water are prepared. This paste is applied all over the Bride’s body especially face, hands and feet by the married ladies of the family. A similar ceremony is also observed at the Groom’s house. The family members smear each other with the same paste and there prevails an atmosphere of happiness and merriment.
There was another ritual of Phoolon Ki Holi, a tradition borrowed from the immortal Jodi of Lord Krishna and Radha who have made us believe in the romance and merrymaking that surrounds this ceremony. A small ritual to adorn the Bride with flowers and petals, congratulating her as she is all set to tie a knot for life.
This was for the first time I had heard this Punjabi Boli, ‘baari barsi khatan gaya si’ and its stuck in my head ever since. How the Jija of the house kept repeating this boli for each member of the family to come and dance to the Taal of the Dholak walas.
Immediately after all this was the Chuda ceremony. The Bride’s maternal uncle and aunt make the Bride wear all the ornaments that are to be adorned by the Bride after her marriage. The most important one being a set of 21 bangles in red and ivory that the Bride is supposed to remove only after a month of her wedding.
Another auspicious and fun ceremony I witnessed that day was the ritual of Kaalerein. These are umbrella shaped golden and silver ornaments that is tied to the chuda of the Bride by the sisters and friends. Soon after tying, the ritual is followed with the Bride shaking her Chuda and Kaalerien on the heads of the unmarried girls. It is believed that if any part of the kaalirein falls on the head of a girl, she will be the next in line to get married.
It did fall on me, Lets see how much of this belief is going to hold true for me.
For this entire set of rituals, the theme was colour based and it had to be yellow. I wore a Block printed cotton skirt from @anokhi Jaipur with an off white cropped top I designed for myself @savboond. To complete the look I draped an off white scarf from @promod and the same beaded juti from the mehendi function from @1469original, Delhi.
‘D’ Day– There’s something truly amazing about the wedding ceremony. The traditions, the vows and all your emotional family members and friends make it one of the most special moments. The main event that starts with a grand Reception, followed by Phera and finally Bidaai.
The first ritual of the wedding day is the exchange of varmalas by the Bride and the Groom. Which is followed by a grand reception for all the friends and family from within and outside the city, to congratulate the Bride and Groom on their wedding.
Once the Reception is done, It is followed by the Phera ceremony where in the Bride and the Groom take seven rounds around a sacred fire lit for the purpose amidst the Vedic mantras and take their respective vows to stand by each other for the rest of their lives. The Groom applies Red Vermillion(sindoor) on the Bride’s forehead and ties a gold necklace(mangalsutra) around the Bride’s neck which is the final ceremony after which the couple is officially married. During this ceremony, the Bride’s parent’s hand over their daughter to the Groom which is called the Kanyadaan Rasam.
Once done with all this, the Bride finally leaves for the Groom’s house which is called the Bidaai of the girl from her parent’s house.
Since this is a very traditional affair, the theme was also Traditional Indian wear.
The entire outfit was designed by me @savboond. I wore a tussar rama green chikan kari embroidery lahenga, a bandhani blouse, a pink organza dupatta with an antique parsi ghara border and a red gold polka dotted dupatta. I completed this look with an emerald green single stone earring from @tribebyamrapali. I repeated the same pointed kitten heels from the Sagai ceremony.
Since it was a night event and the chilly winter winds of Kanpur, made me carry a royal blue suede jacket from @kurseong.
This is how we were done with the wedding after 3 days of pre-wedding rituals. For each ceremony I chose to wear a different kind of Silhouette which I am sure most of us want to do for any Wedding. We want to follow the fashion trends and be upto the mark and look our very best. But, we get driven away either cause of out height or our body type.
I am neither tall, nor am I skinny which makes me look on the healthier side. But why should it stop me from wearing anything that I want to. I clearly believe that everyone should fulfil your desires and fascinations for clothing. Trends are there for us to follow, make it yours.
Despite of being short, I wear minimal heals or flats. I don’t care of how much more shorter am I going to look in front of the rest. There are thousands of styling ideas out there, read, accept and follow it. And the most important thing here is the confidence with which you carry the trends. Your confidence will show in your body language which will eventually make you seem amazing and appealing in front of the rest. So wear what you want, stylise it well and carry your head high. You are beautiful inside out no matter what.
Hope you guys enjoyed the Read as much as I enjoyed sharing it with all of you.